First Friday Open Mic – October 6, 2017, features Catherine Abbey Hodges
Story by Shanna O’Brien
Photos by Ezekiel Espanola
Kern Poetry First Friday open mic at Dagny’s was flowing with enthusiasm and creativity as always. There was standing room only as poets and musicians anxiously awaited their turn to present a piece of their art, hoping to touch the hearts of everyone who listened. And it was obvious that hearts were definitely touched as the packed room exploded with applause at the end of each presentation.
Our featured Bakersfield artist was Catherine Abbey Hodges who read several beautiful poems from her books, Instead of Sadness and Raft of Days. As she captivated the crowd with pictures and emotions in her poetry, her husband, Rob Hodges, accompanied her with warm gentle tones played on his cello. What a treat that was! Rob also played an interlude piece that was improvised on the spot. Together they were breathtaking.
Catherine’s generous answers to my questions below allow us to look into her world.
- Please tell us a little about yourself, your poetry background, what got you started, your influences and inspiration.
I was that shy kid who was always off reading a book or writing something in a secret notebook. We had a lot of books, music, and visual art in our home when I was a child. Later I spent almost a decade in Indonesia with my husband and our children, and I filled journals with the experience of learning a new language and culture and way of being in the world, an experience that changed me in ways I’m still coming to understand and made language and people all the more mysterious and wonderful to me. I was a writer from the get-go, and my degrees are in English, but I didn’t formally turn to poetry until I was almost 40.
At this point in my life, I find I’m influenced and inspired by almost everything. There’s more to write about than there is time in this one life. My poems respond to images from the natural world, memories that surface from last week or somewhere in the 1960s, a phrase a student uses in an essay I’m grading. My new book has a poem inspired by a headline that ran something like “Scientists Discover Water Has Memory.” Really, who doesn’t want to write a poem about that?
My go-to poets, to name a few, are Peter Everwine, Jane Hirshfield, Li-Young Lee, Marie Howe, Stanley Kunitz. I’m inspired by Ross Gay and Tony Hoagland. Annie Dillard is an early and continuing influence. Rebecca Solnit’s incisive and wise prose keeps me alert.
- What are you trying to communicate with your poetry?
I guess if there’s something I want to communicate, it’s an experience, or an invitation to an experience, rather than a message. Reading and writing poems is the best way I know of holding myself still for long enough to really listen, to taste what it’s like to be alive in an unspeakably harrowing and still-beautiful world, to wrestle with my responsibilities in light of the obvious, to plumb all this and wonder at it and grieve and rejoice—those things, in other words, that save us from the spiritual devastation of surface-living. I hope that my poems may help some readers do the same.
- Do you have any creative patterns, routines?
I teach full-time at Porterville College, and my life is brimful of rewarding work in that setting. This does mean, though, that I have to be very deliberate about making time for poems. My current pattern seems to be something like this: write obsessively in a notebook in order to process my life (this looks NOTHING like a poem except in rare instances), and in the course of those scribbles make notes in the margins on images, phrases, and memories that might be poem-fodder; do this for a few weeks; watch for the agitation/irritation/restlessness that means poem ideas are at critical mass; and then find time—2 hours to 2 weeks, depending on what I can manage—to devote solely to generating new poems and to walking. All along, no matter how busy I am, I’m reading the poems of others and feeding myself that way.
- Please tell us about the publications you’ve created.
Instead of Sadness, my first full-length collection, was selected by Dan Gerber for the inaugural Barry Spacks Poetry Prize and was published by Gunpowder Press in 2015. That book contains 16 years’ worth of poems, some of which had been published in a chapbook in 2006 and many of which had appeared in journals and magazines. I was delighted that Gunpowder Press wanted to publish my second collection, Raft of Days, which came out earlier this year. It’s been an honor to see poems of mine featured on The Writer’s Almanac and Verse Daily.
- Please share one of your poems with us.
Since I mentioned Peter Everwine in my influences, here’s a poem dedicated to him. It’s the last poem in Raft of Days and something of an ars poetica
ONE VIOLET IN FEBRUARY
—for Peter Everwine
by Catherine Abbey Hodges
Home from Fresno, I wrote this poem,
then took out everything but the violet.
Later, a little rain fell back in.
There’s no story here,
only the song of tires on the wet street
and me making my way toward
the unsayable, dowsing
my way with syllables,
silence, the goodness of friends.
I’m not there yet, not even sure
I’ll know when I get there.
I couldn’t be happier.
Catherine Abbey Hodges
From Raft of Days, Gunpowder Press, 2017
Thank you so much Catherine for your generosity, your dedication to your art and for your beautiful poetry. You are an inspiration to us all!
***
Before the open mic portion of the night began, we recognized and welcomed the presence of Poet Laureate Don Thompson who came to support Catherine Abbey Hodges! What a thrill! Don mentioned that he has a new book of poetry coming out on December 1, 2017, “From Here On: Four Sunday Drives” and his profile is coming out on October 28th in the Bakersfield Californian insert. Please check out his website: www.don-e-thompson.com
As the night progressed, I was touched by all the poets and especially by the poetic lyrics of two songwriters, Jimmy Borja and David T8tz.
Jimmy Borja is a songwriter born and raised in the Philippines but now a citizen of the U.S. He has written numerous hits and hundreds of songs for artists of Sony-BMG, Universal, Warner and EMI. His songs have also been recorded by a winner and finalists of Star Search, Britain’s Got Talent, Canadian Idol, The Voice-Philippines and ABC’s Duets. He also conducts songwriting workshops and most recently he was a speaker at the West Coast Songwriters Annual Music Conference in San Francisco. Jimmy preferred not to include lyrics to the song he performed but you can hear some of his music at: www.jimmyborjamusic.com.
Jimmy, we wish you continued success with your songwriting!
David T8tz is a newcomer to Bakersfield and has been writing and performing his songs since the age of twelve. He said the songwriter’s road has been long and quite bumpy but luckily he has survived and has completed an album, “Pack Thy Secrets Deep” which
can be found on iTunes, CD Baby, Spotify, Amazon, Bandcamp and Soundcloud. (The band camp portal is his favorite. That link is- https://davidt8tzandhislovelyfriends.bandcamp.com )
His older work can also be found on iTunes and Spotify under- Winston and the Telescreen
Please check out his website: www.PackThySecretsDeep.com
David has a show coming up at The Bakersfield Gay and Lesbian Center with Moon Spirits on Saturday, November 11, 2017 from 7:00 pm to 9:00 pm. Let’s go support him!
Below are lyrics to the title track of David’s album, “Pack Thy Secrets Deep,” performed for us at Dagny’s:
“Pack Thy Secrets Deep”
by David T8tz
He sells all his daylight, he rents out his mind
In a three walled asylum that owns all his time
He had such plans once, dreams of freedom
A pen and a notebook and stories to feed them
He’s made a nightlife inside of a bottle
He prowls his phone apps in search of a song
Companions come easy but they never feed him
He’s starving to death in the midst of them all
Are we going to, Are we going to
Are we going to die this way?
Are we going to, are we going to
Are we going to die…Mama this way?
Cause I’d rather die than see you in such pain
We’re trapped in the flames
Pack Thy Secrets Deep where no one can see them
Pack Thy Secrets Deep and hold them close
She’s back on his doorstep, she’s tear stained and windswept
She’s only come home cause there’s nowhere left to go
Her black eyes match the shade of her track marks
The ones hidden between her fingers and toes
She says “I swear that I’ll stay clean, our daughters they need me
I just need a place I can stay for a while.”
One week later she’s crouched in the corner
She’s screaming, crying, bleeding, and the needle’s on the floor
Are you going to, are you going to
Are you going to die this way?
Are you going to, are you going to
Are you going to die…Mama this way?
Cause I’d rather die than see you in such pain
We’re trapped in the flames
But I’ll pack my secrets deep where no one can see them
I’ll pack my secrets deep and hold them close
Pack Thy Secrets Deep where no one can see them
Pack Thy Secrets Deep and hold them close
So I’ll drink, I’ll get fucked, I’ll press everyone’s luck
Oh on nothing but hatred I’ll feed
There’s an ocean of rage and it’s stuck in my veins
And I can’t seem to fight my way free
I’ve held it together for the sake of our daughters
But my strength is now failing me
So won’t you please hand me a drink?
Won’t you please hand me a drink?
Won’t you please hand me my drink?
David, we thank you for sharing such an honest and deep lyric with us and we look forward to hearing more of your songs and poetry. Welcome to Bakersfield!
A highlight of the evening was when poet Thomas Brill was invited to the stage by our lovely hostess, Portia Chang. Thomas moved the hearts of everyone (and moved me to tears) with his important and truth filled poem, “Valley Fever.” He graciously accepted my request to share some of his poetic journey with us as well as the inspiration behind his meaningful poem.
- Please share your poetic journey, when you started writing and who may have inspired you.
I have been writing poetry since high school. I’m not sure what originally inspired my interest in writing, but I have always needed an outlet for creative expression. I love language and I have a short attention span, so I suppose poetry was a natural. In college I had a very dada-istic or absurdist style, but as the years went by my work went through many metamorphoses. I typically prefer more literal and simple poetry. Probably William Carlos Williams and Pablo Neruda are two of my biggest influences.
At any rate, I wrote “valley fever” soon after I moved to Bakersfield. I had moved here about thirteen years ago from northern California, where I was involved in a poetry group in Sonoma, California that had a monthly reading called the “Center of the Universe,” and
sometimes it felt like it was. My writing developed enormously in that community, and when I first moved to Bakersfield, I was writing quite a bit.
- Tell us why you wrote “Valley Fever” and what you are trying to communicate.
“Valley Fever” was inspired by a real life case that I worked on as a lawyer. A widow approached me about her farmworker husband’s death of valley fever. He had been misdiagnosed, and eventually succumbed to the disease and died. I changed his name, of course, and the actual details are of my own invention. I have worked as a lawyer on behalf of many migrant workers and so this is a subject that has always been near to my heart. As the public debate about immigrants rages on, I do my best to help a few of those in need in situations that have nothing to do with their status in this country. In that work, I have come to know the immigrant community in a much more intimate way, so I simply try to see the human side of it without regard to their legal status.
I think the message of the poem is pretty obvious. Immigrants come here looking for a better life and often end up finding themselves cut off from their families, struggling to get by in a strange land, and in desperate circumstances. There are so many perils related to being undocumented in the United States, including threats from “coyotes,” the unscrupulous traffickers who help people cross and often have ties to drug families, when they cannot pay the exorbitant fees to come here illegally, being abused in their workplace, and even being afraid to report crimes since they think they may be deported. I am obviously sympathetic to their plight, and the poem is simply intended to show a different side of the picture than we often see in the media, one that I have dealt with on a personal basis.
- Please share your poem, “Valley Fever.”
Valley Fever
by Thomas Brill
Miguel Echavarria died illegally,
a fungus carried quietly on dust spores
filled his lungs, alone in a hospital bed,
736 miles from a hand to hold
He had gone to Madera where his primo
got him a job in the tomatoes,
the mayordomo was from Ixtapa too,
unlicensed uninsured undocumented
and unregulated, Miguel kept
driving the tomato truck even after
they deported his primo, leaving him
alone with the dusty dreams of a
campesino and truckloads of
semi-ripe tomatoes ready for the warehouse
where they would be gassed red and bug free,
Miguel and the other “aliens” loading
crates freshly picked onto the dusted flat bed,
dry dirt thick like smoke in the heat of
$25 a ton,
only the dust spores are free of charge.
Breath deep, young man, be strong,
your family’s burden placed on your
sturdy shoulders, you still have your
youth, your health, your work,
shares an apartment with four other men,
his girlfriend in Mexico didn’t have the heart
to invite him to her wedding with her
newfound sweetheart, though she did name her son
Miguel.
Miguel caught the fever and they sent him
to the clinic where the nameless go,
where the doctors ask few questions
and hand out generic solutions,
sent him home with a bottle of hopes
that he could return to work
and he did, working the rest of the week
a little overtime to send off a postal order,
$200.
Sinews strain and the eyes go blank,
the head is heavy, the dust hangs everywhere,
it seems, even in his dreams. dust borne
fingers running through his hair, his blood,
misdiagnosed, indifferent to antibiotics
that were not designed for valley fever,
a fungus slowly eating away
at his future, his family’s too.
until one day he couldn’t get up, the wet rags
no longer cooled his feverish mind, he was
alone in a cold bed on a hot Autumn afternoon,
the money orders suddenly stopped,
he rolled back and forth and his eyes
rolled up in his head and he died.
Just there, just like that,
the indentation still in his pillow
when the ambulance took him away,
John Doe 13, coccidiodes immitis,
the death certificate said, but no one read it
anyway.
Thank you so much Thomas Brill for coming to Dagny’s and sharing your poem, “Valley Fever.” Such poetry raises consciousness and awareness which is a gift to all of us. Much respect to you.
***
Well — that’s a recap of another enlightening, inspiring and creative evening. Please come back to our website again and get to know more of our wonderful poets and musicians who participate in the Kern Poetry First Friday event at Dagny’s. Everyone is different yet we’re all the same, wanting to express what’s in our hearts.
KEEP WRITING
